Sorry!

Previous post was a joke.

Okay!.. Let’s start again.

When does a person blog?

Ans: When he is alone.

Alone here has many connotations. Not exactly here. Everywhere. Everywhere it has many connotations. (I was going to use the ‘word’ meaning. But I compulsively wanted to impress some high-headed readers and hence, I took assistance from Right click – Synonyms. Sorry to those who didn’t understand the meaning of the word connotation. The meaning of connotation is meaning. Which also implies that connotation of the word meaning is connotation.) Fuck! Where was I?



Yes. The connotations of Alone. Alone could be mentally alone, physically alone, economically alone, strategically alone and other such alones. But what I am referring to is predominantly tow Alones. Alone without family and Alone with family. When you are without your family, which also includes people attached to you like the tentacles of an octopus and not just the usual limbs of your family. It includes your friends, enemies, shopkeepers, friend’s wives for some. Your girlfriend or boyfriend or both in case you are a bisexual and your ‘kaamwali bai’ in case you are a bai-sexual (and I am not referring to someone from the Ahuja family who ‘Shines’). There is an alone which points towards the absence of these species in your life. The other Alone directs towards the overt, indulging, interfering and irritating presence of these or similar species in your life, from which you constantly distance yourself due their unending ability to bore you using heinous techniques like disowning, disregarding, taunting and advising – all of which are of course futile on your thick rhinoceros branded skin.

In both cases, the blogger wants to be heard. This urge to speak out aloud somehow cannot be fulfilled in the real world because police arrest everything that is ‘loud’ after 10.00 p.m. That includes loud voice, loud volumes and loud make-ups. Loud police sirens are somehow exempted from this as they are supposed to alert the loud in a loud manner.

So people write blogs to be heard!

Also some write blogs to be famous.

A few names to mention:
-Aamir Khan
-Amitabh Bacchan
-Anurag Kashyap
-Priyanka Chopra (Huh?!)
-Shahrukh Khan
-Shatrughan Sinha (does he have a blog?)
-Uday Chopra (He has a production house which he uses as a blog to make movies with
him as a central character.)
-Sanjay Dutt (one fake name always works)
-Fake IPL Player
-Shammi Kapoor (sorry! Was falling short of names on d list!)

So what if they are already famous?… They blog because they want to be more famous.

Then there are people who blog to show off . Some to gain popularity. Some to write. Simply write. Anything. I have seen people writing about the ‘ml’ in which they urinated last night.

And some guys blog because they simply want to vent it out.

This new blog I’ve started is an outcome of two factors from the above mentioned reasons.

I do not guarantee you that it would make sense each time. In fact I do not guarantee you it would make sense at all…

Please do not expect superior grammar and absence of typos because I am writing this just to punch the keys on my keyboard to form readable sentences, since I cannot punch people who enrage me, in their faces. Neither them who cause situations in my life. Nor those who are responsible for me. Nor the people who are responsible for anything. Nor people who are responsible. Nor people who are. Nor people who. Nor People. Nor. Knorr soups. (One of my old seniors had loved its hoardings because the corn on it was attractively yellow. I don’t know if it was corns or the yellow that had enticed him. If it had been corns, I would’ve taken him to meet my granny. She has got corns on her leg.)

That’s enough to begin with I think!

Finally, please keep reading this blog. I want to be famous while being heard when I am venting it out to show off!